Thursday, May 8, 2014

It's all about perspective.

Chalk Artist Unknown.
Perspective can be lineal or aerial when depicting spatial relationships on a flat surface. Some chalk artists use perspective to create illusions to trick pedestrians.

Or, perspective refers to the state of one's ideas; the facts as one understands them to be. Illusion can be created using this perspective too.

Why isn't there enough time to finish drinking the cup of coffee you poured before it gets cold? Why is there never enough time to finish your tasks for the day? Why does life have to be so stressful?

It isn't as though time is selectively passing faster for you, causing your coffee to cool before you can drink it or work to be over before it is completed.

It's all in perspective. When you stop having a self centered perspective, relationships with others improve and stress decreases.
Find out how to use your senses to gain perspective.

For most, an average day is a busy day. There are meetings, appointments, deadlines and due dates. At home there is the honey-do-list.

It can be frustrating. Work hard all day only to go home and have a list of chores. Or to work hard all day at home trying to hold freelance clients, chase a three year old and a dog while keeping a clean home only to have the other come home and watch the television.

Some days it feels as if the only one working hard is you.

But is a list of chores, or the sound of the television really what is being said?

The sound of the television is my husband's way to switch gears from working to being at home. He isn't ignoring me by sitting down. His silence isn't because he doesn't want to be involved in the household chores. It is actually an invitation for me to join him.

By sitting with him, he is able to decompress faster. We can talk about our day, what the other was up to. By the time Jeopardy! is over, he will be relaxed and I will have had time to explain why I didn't get the garbage out today, and ask him for help.

When we only take the time to hear things from our own perspective it is difficult to get a whole picture and impossible to work together. 

A new toy has been discarded. A old favorite is being ignored. There is only one book he can read, and that is because it is memorized.

Chores still need to be done. I have dishes and dusting to do. Vacuuming and sweeping. Laundry and ironing.

"Moooommmmmyyyy. Come play with me," my son says as he follows me from room to room.

I hear whining. I see an ungrateful little boy who must be too spoiled to be content to play by himself. Can't he see that Mommy is busy?

He can.

Not playing with his toys or books isn't a sign he is ungrateful or even spoiled. He follows me around because spending time with me as my shadow is better than playing with trucks, trains or even Legos.

Kids, even some husbands, might be content to use the same pair of underwear for a week, but mom's are not. Some chores must get done, but it doesn't need to be an either chores or playing situation.

All a kid wants is to spend time with their parents. What they do isn't all that important. Turn the everyday mundane list of tasks you feel is important to complete into a game. 

The dishes are handed to me from the dishwasher faster than I can put them away. Every shirt I put on a hanger is hung up in the closet by the time the next one is ready to be put away. While I vacuum, he Swiffers. While he dusts, I wash windows.

Work together and it gets done faster. Everybody wins. 
Less stress, less whining, less dirt and more fun.

Perspective is all about how you choose to see and hear. 

If you are stressed and frustrated because you feel other's are not listening to you, ask yourself a question. Am I only thinking from a "me" perspective?

Take the time to slow down and think from another person's point of view.
Understanding comes only after you've considered others first. 
It is a difficult thing to do, but the effort is worth it. 
I have experienced a notable difference in my stress levels because I stopped thinking about how everything effects me. By considering other people's perspectives I am able to be more productive; leaving more time for family and relaxing. Overall, I am happier. 

Taking the time considering another person's perspective, leaves you with the time to enjoy a hot cup of coffee in the morning.

Every day is a good day when it is started with a cup of coffee. Don't you think so too?

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